How to be better than the former and conquer it?

The times when young people are absolutely young andinnocent parents were wooing, long gone. We are not in a hurry to marry, but we may not have one relationship with the opposite sex before marriage. On this occasion, a logical question arises: how to be better than the former?

I want a man in a relationship with you to thinkonly about you, not about your previous relationships and about their main participant. What does it mean "to be the best" and is it worth it to pursue this in order to be happy in a relationship? Let's talk about this in this post.

Best the enemy of the good

Sad to say, we oftenstrive to be the best in everything. Why "regrettable"? Because the desire is in many respects unnatural. Perhaps, our upbringing is guilty - very often parents from childhood inspire their kids that either they are already the best, or should be so.

But remember that being the best does not mean beinghappy. The concept of "the most beautiful" or "the most intelligent" is very conditional, and in order to get such a label, a girl can sacrifice very much, and in particular herself and her individuality.

How to be better than others? And who exactly is better? And in what? Do you want to be more beautiful than Masha from the neighboring yard, better to cook than Katya's neighbor, and to make fun of Marina's friends? Even if there was some measure that would allow you to quantify each of your dignity, believe that you are magnificent and unique in the form in which you are. Be yourself - that's the main condition for being the best!

But this, of course, does not mean that you do not need to eitherwhat to strive for. If you realize that you need to improve your body and do sports or read more to be more educated, then do it. But remember, this makes sense for your development, and not to be more attractive to some young man.

How to become better than the former and conquer it?

There is nothing seditious about fighting forlike a man and conquer him. Times when the ladies obediently waited for their prince at the window, passed. Now the girls "go" first and win. But is there any pleasure in "fighting" for a man? Will it not happen that the conquered will not entirely belong to you, but rather, will feel like a prisoner of your bonds of love?

We will consider below ways how to become better (as far as possible), however, the advice will be with the caveat in which case your efforts may be in vain.

Past relationships that interfere with your present

Let's say you love yourself the way you areyou are, so do not strive for unnecessary perfection. You met a worthy young man and entered into a relationship. And ... you feel that past attitudes are aggressively interfering with your life. A young man often remembers his ex-passion with a kind word, and you get only criticism. A thought arises unnaturally: how to be better than the former? We'll figure out how to do this and whether we should even strive to do this.

Is it worth it to learn to cook?

You normally earn money and think that alreadyit's good that you can open the yogurt yourself or cut the sausage. If the joke that the mistress was the best mayonnaise, about you, then the young man's displeased comments that the borshch of the former girl was simply delicious, and it would be nice to take an example from her, are not without foundation. The answer to the question: "How to become better than his ex?" Has an unambiguous answer: "Learn to cook!" The girls were born to be feminine, beautiful and magnificent keepers of the hearth. Men are pleased that women are building a career and working, but this does not remove from the ladies responsibilities to feed their household.

So if you really want to be better atIn this particular case, take a few free master classes from a friend, mom or grandmother. If you understand that this is not for you, then the relationship is likely not to be asked - what kind of girl will tolerate constant comparisons with the former not in their favor?

To be more beautiful (slimmer, sportier)?

It seems that everything is fine in your relations. But the beloved looks from time to time with a sad sigh photo ex-passion, and then dissatisfiedly looks at you. Here it is necessary to understand.

How to be better than the former? And whether it is necessary? Suppose your appearance is not perfect even in your opinion - a few extra pounds, the lack of fine taste in clothes or a snub nose. But do you know that a loving look turns flaws into cute favorites?

If a young man without a memory is in love with you andoffers to work with him to do fitness, so that you become healthier and more beautiful, this is one thing. Not bad, if he suggests you try to try on something new out of clothes and leads you to shopping. If the beloved offers you to go to the gym for the reason that you do not meet his ideal, then it's bad. When you get the shape of his dreams (notice, not his own), it turns out that you should not have to do rhinoplasty, build hair or something.

How to be? Better than others, you can become only for a short period of time, while on the horizon of attention of your chosen one someone will not be more interesting. And then before you set a new goal - learn the language, go to yoga courses or insert implants in the ass. Of you will be obstinately molding Galatea, who, however, can not have either her own opinion or desires.

How to be a good mistress?

Sexual life is also no longer somethingshameful and very delicate. Partners can and should talk to each other about their desires, preferences, fantasies. This contributes to your rapprochement and comfortable pastime. But you will agree, the difference is huge - whether you are offered to be more relaxed, or compare (not in your favor) with the ex-girlfriend.

How to be a good mistress? The answer is universal - be as relaxed as possible, follow your desires, do not do what seems unnatural or unpleasant to you. Tips like "think about a partner" throw away - when you think about someone, you become enslaved, you start to over-monitor the process.

But be attentive to the comparisons. If there is someone else in your bed with someone else, the situation may not change. Love yourself and respect! No matter how good a young man is, know that in any case you deserve to be the only one!

Developing the intellect

It is very unpleasant if a man reproaches you forstupidity. Of course, he defended more than one dissertation and was nominated for the Nobel Prize last year, so everything converges! No? So why does this young man allow himself to reproach you with something? Is he intelligent in all spheres of knowledge? Let you do not know any laws of physics or are not strong in geography, but, you see, there is something in what you - as! For example, you know all the actors of our time, know how to cook, or love to read. There are no people who know everything. Any successful scientist became so only because he gave himself completely to the study of an interesting topic, abstracted from the rest.

Therefore, if you are reproached with stupidity bycompared with the ex-girlfriend, then this dilemma is insoluble. How to be better than the former in such a situation? Yes, nothing. No matter how much you read, you will not become smart enough in his eyes.

Rivalry in the present tense

And what if the attention of a man is not directed atthe past, but the present? If now someone else is fighting for the attention of your chosen one? How to be a better opponent? Remember that there are qualities that can not be quantified. Why do we like this person in particular? because he is the best of all, or because there is something special in it for us? The fact is that you can exceed your opponent in all respects, be more beautiful, smarter, witty, but the man will still fall in love with you. Believe that in this case the struggle is inappropriate. So, for you there is someone else, and you have not met him yet. However, there is a meeting, it is inevitable!

Another component of success

Many pretty beautiful, educated girlsunhappy in their personal lives. Surely you have more than one friend who is clever, and beautiful, but alone. Why is it so? Perhaps the answer lies in the following - this girl is not confident in herself and does not like herself.

Remember that people who are in demandthe opposite sex, madly in love, and not in anyone, but in yourself. This is not about sick pride, but about healthy selfishness. Only if you value yourself, if you take care of yourself and do not give yourself offense to others, you will be lucky in the relationship. A woman who loves herself will be loved by a man, and the former or real rivals will have no chance.

And finally

You got a secret weapon, the answer to the question,how to be better than the former. The component of the answer is that you are already better, that you are the best, unique and unusual. If your elect now and then looks back in the past and deals with comparisons not in your favor, then, perhaps, those relationships are still just not over.

Meanwhile, each of us should develop andimprove - not for someone, but for yourself. So do what you like. Attend fitness classes, cookery courses, build a career or just enjoy life.